I have struggled with my weight for the past 11 years. After I had my son, I no longer had the body I wanted. One of the things that I’ve heard most was “you should get a goal (article of clothing).” So in my closet, I have many articles of clothing that are my “goal shirt/pants/bathing suit/etc”. And I have not been able to fit any one of those. They’re still sitting in my closet.
I would refuse to buy bigger clothes because “I can squeeze into this” and then I’d be uncomfortable for the rest of the day. I even resorted to wearing my boyfriend’s clothes. I told him once, as we were walking through the women’s department at Macy’s as I was checking out all these clothes I wanted to buy in a smaller size: “The only exercise I get is at the mall, walking with my boyfriend, in his clothes, looking like a lesbian.” Because truly from outside eyes, I looked like the stereotypical female who wore men’s clothing because she was into women. So when girls would check him out, my dirty looks at them meant nothing, because they thought I was into them. I’m also pretty sure the way I said it at the moment was funnier than what I’m typing now. I was going to turn that into a joke, but I couldn’t work it.
So the work clothes I was squeezing into was starting to frustrate me. So I gave in, and went to the clearance rack and bought some bigger clothes. I felt better. Not because I was thinking “oh I got new clothes!” or “These are my new goal clothes!” But because I could breathe. I could bend over without worrying about my plumber crack. I had the movement I needed. So I took this into deep consideration.
“Why do I not go to the gym?” -I’m wearing my boyfriend’s clothes and I feel frumpy and gross.
“Why can’t I work out at the park?” -I wouldn’t be caught outside trying to work out in this outfit.
“Why don’t I work out at home?” -All my sports bras don’t have enough support because they either don’t fit or are old and stretched out.
Then that’s when it hit me. I started going crazy and now I have this weird addiction to buying workout clothes. My entire wardrobe consists of sports bras, workout tanks, and leggings; that all fit me. I’m not ashamed to go and work out any where. I love it that I can color coordinate before I head out. I bought some cute outfits for when I go out with my boyfriend and my friend. Granted I’m a on a budget, and these are all cheap items from the clearance rack or are on sale on a website. But I feel great. And I’ve been putting this into motion for about 2 months now, and I can already feel the difference. Some times the “goal shirt” is not really buying something in a smaller size, but buying something you’d want to wear now. Just to look good, to feel good, to inspire you and put a smile on your face and make you feel beautiful.
Progress report: my boyfriend’s shorts don’t fit me anymore. He gets to have his clothes back.